I m lost

everythg maybe is still the same...but the changes juz happen in my own little world ..
i think tis is the problem and wat i need to solve..

i dont know y i realise tat my disappearance between all relationship...
friendship ... and oso my drum life...
where r my frens?y all suddenly disappear...or it was tat b4 ..juz i didnt make any sense?

sorry guys..hu try to make me happy...i can be happy when all of u r beside me
but it maybe is not true...i dont noe y i have a mask ...and it will be used when facing frens..
hahaha.....ok....it is not the most important...

the most important...is i m lost...i m trying to find out the real ZEN....
maybe for the whole life i cant get it too...maybe juz need a second...
it depand on natural...i like natural..but reality is disturbing.....

Who m i ...i think nobody noe wat person is the real ZEN..